Beetle the Horn King
Director: Minoru Kawasaki
Year: 2005
Rating: 4.5
Aka - Kabuto-O Beetle
They say - who I am not really sure - that no matter your taste you will
find movies that satisfy it. But that also goes in the other direction -
that no matter what films you make, there is an audience out there somewhere
that will gravitate towards it. No matter how eccentric, silly and absurd.
There is an audience for it. Which gets me to Japanese director Minoru Kawasaki
who has been putting out films since 2004 and just released his latest last
year titled Monster Seafood Wars. If you have never heard of him - join the
rest of the world. But with his weird nonsensical parodies, he has a fan
base out there and his films have played in festivals that specialize in
bringing people something different and far out of the mainstream. One suspects
that he has a fanboy love for Mexican wrestling films, Kaiju films and Ultraman
and he took that fanboy love and made his own films independent of what the
world thinks.
His first film was The Calamari Wrestler about a wrestler with a fatal disease
who turns into a giant calamari and continues to wrestle. Then there was
Executive Koala about a koala with a man's body or a man with a koala head
who is just your basic salaryman or maybe a serial killer. I vaguely recall
seeing it but can't remember which. The Crab Goalkeeper is about a giant
crab hired to tend goal. The World Sinks Except Japan is a counterpoint to
the Japanese film Japan Sinks. In this case only Japan is not sinking and
refugees are coming to Japan. As best as I recall most of it takes place
in a bar where people from all over the world talk. Then there is this film.
Where to I start? I will give it to you straight as if this was just a normal
film. You have to fill in the weirdness. A wrestling match is taking place
when it is interrupted by the EST - Extraterrestrial Stylish Taboo - headed
by Cockroachie. Cockroachie and the other Pests are what seem to be giant
insects but with men's heads who speak Japanese. They start pushing people
about and threatening to rule the world when they hear a guitar strumming.
They stop for this is the Beetle King in a sombrero and poncho - he is the
hero of our film and quickly puts an end to their troublemaking. Later he
gets knocked out and is brought home by a reporter - Yuri - where Bill Robinson
shows up to tell her his story. Robinson in real life was a British wrestler
who was especially popular in Japan and opened up mixed martial arts training
facilities - he passed away in 2014.
He once trained the Beetle King and his friend Stag Beetle but Hitomi comes
between them and they became enemies. They end up in Peru at the Aztec ruins
when an alien spaceship zaps them aboard and injects insect DNA into them
thus making them human insects with powers. Why? In order to sell toy merchandise
of them. All making sense so far? Other stuff happens - the Beetle King gets
run over flat but recuperates when they bring him to the Mask Palace which
is a paradise for people in masks - and are served by lovely women not wearing
masks. Eventually, he and Stag Beetle have to fight - in a ring with a crowd
- for the survival of the human race. I may have missed some stuff - probably
a lot of stuff - though at 66 minutes it wasn't as long as it felt. Super
low budget. Some people will be amused. For the most part I was not.
