The Eternal Evil of Asia
Director: Cash Chin Man-kei
Year: 1995
Rating: 7.5
There can be something
quite satisfying about a film that aims no higher than to entertain with
a schlocky high speed tongue in cheek mix of horror, violence, comedy and
sex. This one spews out its contents like a five-day drug induced multi-colored
binge in which reality and fantasy have converged in a narcoleptic nightmare
that leaves you gasping and laughing at the same time. This is a morality
tale, a warning – don’t leave home – don’t go to South East Asia – don’t
mess with the local girls and in the end - true love conquers all sorts of
evil. Of course having a witch on your side helps.
Four Hongies go to Thailand and soon find themselves caught in the middle
of a feud between one wizard (Ben Ng) and another wizard and his witch wife
(Julie Lee). During this Elvis Tsui Kam Kong finds that he has literally been
turned into a “dickhead” and things are looking bad when the wizard/wife team
utilize the “mating hex” – riding her husband naked across the skies while
bombarding Ben Ng with explosive bursts – until another of the foursome, Chan
Kwok-bong, intervenes and saves Ng. Initially this gets them into his good
graces, but a mistakenly used “love hex” later and he is intent on killing
all four of them.
Back in the supposed safety of Hong Kong, all sorts of terrible things begin
to happen to the foursome from going insane and killing your family to eating
all the patrons in a restaurant including yourself to looking like a masochistic
pin cushion. Though Ng only initially sets out for some good old fashioned
revenge, he slowly begins to turn completely mad – urged on to more evil by
the spirit boy he keeps in a jar – and by his lust for Ellen Chan. Ellen realizes
that something is wrong when her boyfriend, Chan, has problems becoming aroused
during a little strip and tease on her part (I mean you would have to be
hexed for this to happen!). One of her friends, Lily Chung, turns out to
be a Thai witch and the two of them try to contrive a plan to bring down Ng.
This entails one of the more absurd and yet erotic solo scenes put to screen
in which Ellen distracts Ng and the rest of the viewing audience.
This is a ludicrously enjoyable film that lives up to its trashy reputation.
There are some slow bits strewn about – but even those are filled with scenes
such as Yuen King Tan using a brown paper bag to give some girls an oral sex
lesson. Full of imagery, edited in rapid fashion, without a semblance of
good taste – and yet really meant to be more fun than frightening – this is
good entertainment for the whole family – as long as your family is over eighteen
and have received electroshock therapy in the last six months. There are
also a few valuable tips given out here – don’t leave your cut hair on the
barber shop floor – and if a young boy is sitting next to you at the movie
theater and asks to be escorted to the men’s room – don’t expect to ever
be seen again.
