Cop Shop Babes
Director: Aman Chang
Year: 2001
Rating: 4.0
For those of you
with more discerning taste than I have (that would be most of you I believe)
who found Martial Angels to be a torturous barefooted walk on broken glass,
I advise you to put a large continent between yourself and Cop Shop Babes!
Don’t be misled like I was by the cover into thinking that this would be
a tender and intimate look into the female bonding that takes place in the
world of women law enforcement. I was shocked to find out that this film
actually seemed to place a higher premium on cleavage than it did on storytelling
or relationships. Shocked, I tell you. In fact, this film like the before
mentioned Martial Angels are both sadly under the impression that weak willed
males will be satisfied by simply filling the screen with a bevy of curvaceous
beauties. Where does such troglodyte thinking come from? Don’t producers
know that we are offended by women wearing clingy low cut bathing suits for
no purpose whatsoever or are in fact repelled by exploitive scenes such as
having them tied up and hosed down – in slo-mo! We should start a letter
campaign. Right after I watch this film again.
Actually, I don’t think I will be watching this one again any time soon.
Even the pleasures of watching these lovely new actresses along with a lovely
older one, could not make up for what a dreary bore this is. Look closely
at the cover above. See those two twits in the bottom right hand corner?
Now look above them and see those splendid and highly talented actresses.
Who would you prefer spending 90-minutes watching? Frighteningly, the director
apparently thought we would prefer the company of Eason Chan and Jerry Lam
– two less exciting actors I can hardly begin to imagine – but they are the
focus of this film. Oh, and Cheung Tat Ming - we get to watch him do various
animal impersonations for a seeming eternity while dressed up in drag. There
are times I wish I could hijack a film set and make my own movie!
I have no doubt that these young actresses – Lillian Ho, Lam Wai-ling, Li
Shan-shan, Cathy Chui and Fu Tin-wing – are fine actresses with years of
stage experience and schooling at the HK Academy of Performers – (likely
the top of their respective classes) but it is admittedly a little difficult
to evaluate their thespian skills in this film. The director seems intent
on giving them as little to say as possible, but they still managed to shine
through his negligence. Lillian Ho has clearly been spending her exile in
Taiwan wisely practicing her pout. I can only begin to imagine the arduous
workouts she gave that lower lip in front of the mirror – the bleeding, the
blisters – it makes you want to cry at such devotion to her craft. Now Lam
Wai-ling looks to have stopped growing height wise a long ways back, but
she never gave up on her breasts and they have reached award worthy proportions.
This is a good thing as her breasts do most of the acting here – and deserve
some sort of supporting award for the hose water scene – they came under
a lot of intense pressure in that scene but never once asked for a stunt
double. What troopers they are.
Li Shan-shan is the standout here of the young crop of starlets. In more
ways than one. She not only gets more screen time than the others – but her
cleavage is given the royal treatment in a number of scenes. They probably
had their own chair to rest in between shots. I was worried that Lam’s breasts
would get upset over the attention being paid to Li Shan-shan’s, but a truce
was declared and all went home happy. Doing her best to keep a low profile
is Fu Tin-wing. She has the toughest acting role – having to pretend to be
romantically interested in Eason Chan – they must have drawn straws and Fu
clearly lost. Rounding out this young female cast is poor Cathy Chui – from
Tsui Hark’s Time and Tide (the policewoman) to Cop Shop Babes. Her manager
– “Cathy, have I got a great role for you – that crummy Tide and Time doesn’t
seem to have ruined your career after all. You will love this – you spend
the whole movie speaking English, whining and being wooed by Jerry Lam. This
could put your career back in high gear.”
Somewhere in this is the wonderful Carina Lau. Every time I see Carina I
hope she will repeat her little stairway hootchie-kootchie dance from Days
of Being Wild but such was not the case. Of course, I think that being in
this film is some clever plan to get Tony Leung back. There can be no other
explanation. How could he not feel some sympathy after watching her being
nuzzled by a blotchy Wong Jing. She is also looking fabulous. She has become
a spokesperson for a spa in Hong Kong and has been working out and has it
ever paid off. I think Tony be big fool for
having wandering eye. Looking good IS the best revenge.
The movie. Do I have to? All these women work for Carina – and Eason and
Jerry also get assigned to the group. Eason chases after Li and Fu – Jerry
goes after Cathy – Carina chases her self-respect. They all go after a mad
bomber, Tony Ho, and his bad-ass moll, Li Fei. Some outtakes are shown at
the end and Tony mistakenly slaps Li as hard as hell across the face. She
just shakes it off and says lets try it again. She is the only actor in this
film that can do an action scene with some authenticity and I wish she had
more time than she does in this film – though she does have the only half
decent fight scene against Li Shan-shan. One other minor highlight of the
film is a rare appearance from the big Frankie Chan (the one in Full Contact)
as one of Ho’s thugs. Other highlights? Let me get back to you on that one.
