Cop Shop Babes
For those of you with more discerning taste than
I have (that would be most of you I believe) who found Martial Angels to
be a torturous barefooted walk on broken glass, I advise you to put a large
continent between yourself and Cop Shop Babes! Don’t be misled like I was
by the cover into thinking that this would be a tender and intimate look
into the female bonding that takes place in the world of women law enforcement.
I was shocked to find out that this film actually seemed to place a higher
premium on cleavage than it did on storytelling or relationships. Shocked,
I tell you. In fact, this film like the before mentioned Martial Angels
are both sadly under the impression that weak willed males will be satisfied
by simply filling the screen with a bevy of curvaceous beauties. Where
does such troglodyte thinking come from? Don’t producers know that we are
offended by women wearing clingy low cut bathing suits for no purpose whatsoever
or are in fact repelled by exploitive scenes such as having them tied up
and hosed down – in slo-mo! We should start a letter campaign. Right after
I watch this film again.
Actually, I don’t think I will be watching this
one again any time soon. Even the pleasures of watching these lovely new
actresses along with a lovely older one, could not make up for what a dreary
bore this is. Look closely at the cover above. See those two twits in the
bottom right hand corner? Now look above them and see those splendid and
highly talented actresses. Who would you prefer spending 90-minutes watching?
Frighteningly, the director apparently thought we would prefer the company
of Eason Chan and Jerry Lam – two less exciting actors I can hardly begin
to imagine – but they are the focus of this film. Oh, and Cheung Tat Ming
- we get to watch him do various animal impersonations for a seeming eternity
while dressed up in drag. There are times I wish I could hijack a film
set and make my own movie!
I have no doubt that these young actresses – Lillian
Ho, Lam Wai-ling, Li Shan-shan, Cathy Chui and Fu Tin-wing – are fine actresses
with years of stage experience and schooling at the HK Academy of Performers
– (likely the top of their respective classes) but it is admittedly a little
difficult to evaluate their thespian skills in this film. The director
seems intent on giving them as little to say as possible, but they still
managed to shine through his negligence. Lillian Ho has clearly been spending
her exile in Taiwan wisely practicing her pout. I can only begin to imagine
the arduous workouts she gave that lower lip in front of the mirror – the
bleeding, the blisters – it makes you want to cry at such devotion to her
craft. Now Lam Wai-ling looks to have stopped growing height wise a long
ways back, but she never gave up on her breasts and they have reached award
worthy proportions. This is a good thing as her breasts do most of the
acting here – and deserve some sort of supporting award for the hose water
scene – they came under a lot of intense pressure in that scene but never
once asked for a stunt double. What troopers they are.
Li Shan-shan is the standout here of the young
crop of starlets. In more ways than one. She not only gets more screen
time than the others – but her cleavage is given the royal treatment in
a number of scenes. They probably had their own chair to rest in between
shots. I was worried that Lam’s breasts would get upset over the attention
being paid to Li Shan-shan’s, but a truce was declared and all went home
happy. Doing her best to keep a low profile is Fu Tin-wing. She has the
toughest acting role – having to pretend to be romantically interested
in Eason Chan – they must have drawn straws and Fu clearly lost. Rounding
out this young female cast is poor Cathy Chui – from Tsui Hark’s Time and
Tide (the policewoman) to Cop Shop Babes. Her manager – “Cathy, have I
got a great role for you – that crummy Tide and Time doesn’t seem to have
ruined your career after all. You will love this – you spend the whole
movie speaking English, whining and being wooed by Jerry Lam. This could
put your career back in high gear.”
Somewhere in this is the wonderful Carina Lau.
Every time I see Carina I hope she will repeat her little stairway hootchie-kootchie
dance from Days of Being Wild but such was not the case. Of course, I think
that being in this film is some clever plan to get Tony Leung back. There
can be no other explanation. How could he not feel some sympathy after
watching her being nuzzled by a blotchy Wong Jing. She is also looking
fabulous. She has become a spokesperson for a spa in Hong Kong and has
been working out and has it ever paid off.
I think Tony be big fool for having wandering eye. Looking good IS the
The movie. Do I have to? All these women work
for Carina – and Eason and Jerry also get assigned to the group. Eason
chases after Li and Fu – Jerry goes after Cathy – Carina chases her self-respect.
They all go after a mad bomber, Tony Ho, and his bad-ass moll, Li Fei.
Some outtakes are shown at the end and Tony mistakenly slaps Li as hard
as hell across the face. She just shakes it off and says lets try it again.
She is the only actor in this film that can do an action scene with some
authenticity and I wish she had more time than she does in this film –
though she does have the only half decent fight scene against Li Shan-shan.
One other minor highlight of the film is a rare appearance from the big
Frankie Chan (the one in Full Contact) as one of Ho’s thugs. Other highlights?
Let me get back to you on that one.
My rating for this film: 4.0